Juxtaposed to exhibit A: a normal person

I'm faking it. This control and confidence and security. I'm not even sure if I was fooling anyone to begin with. It bugs me more than it should sometimes that I can't relate to people. I feel like a damn outcast and I'm not sure how to fix it. I'm not even sure if it should be/can be fixed. Should we change our nature? Can we change our nature? I don't cry anymore. Not when I should. I think it's all back there - my sympathy, my empathy, my giving a damn. But now when something happens to m friends or family all I can find myself doing is asking how everything's going and offering my support. I know somewhere deep inside I should be more troubled that they're having problems but I can't seem to muster that much sincerity. I can't seem to fully shake my own problems...does this make me a normal person or an uncaring bitch? I can't stop thinking about the talk that I had with my friend months ago...I hate that this person that I let my guard down to just took off the handicaps and swung away with reckless abandon. I feel myself starting to clam up, so I think I'll continue this mental babble later on.