Like I Was Prematurely Awakened From A Dream

There’s so much on my mind that I want to get out into the open but I can’t because A) not only will I sound depressing, B) I will come across as incoherent and mildly retarded and C) I honestly don’t know how to get it all out. This whole writing process is supposed to be cathartic but all I feel is confusion and regret for eating a whole plate of General Tso’s chicken for lunch...the writing doesn't cause the regret I just thought I would be one hundred percent open with how I’m feeling. Possibly too much information, I don’t know. I feel pretty confused to be honest – when did people start thinking that life would become perfect and carefree when they struck the lottery? What happened to wanting to be a ballerina or an astronaut or a fire fighter? It disappoints me when I hear so many people only want money in their lives, and I hope that some of them aspire for bigger and better things beyond it – but at the same time I can’t talk or criticize because I’ve never felt that hunger that some of them do, and for me to even sympathize would be condescending in a way. So….I sit and I observe. I do love watching the definition of the human condition re-write itself as time progresses.